Thoughts & Essays

Roe v. Wade, Part II

A few facts about me: I’m about to be 46 years old, I’m on my way to menopause, and I got permanently sterilized about 15 years ago. So the odds of me ever needing an abortion are pretty low. I do have an increased risk of ectopic pregnancy, due to the sterilization.

I never wanted kids, so I’ve always been very careful. Doubled up on the birth control methods my whole life, and the hot second I had the money and could find a doctor who’d do it, I got sterilized.

I was never super worried about an accidental pregnancy, because I always had the option to terminate it. And now, all of the sudden, I might not.

I live in Oregon, where I still have the right to seek an abortion, if I need one. But… in another four years, I may not have that option. We get a GOP Congress and president, and that protection could disappear. I’m one federal anti-abortion law away from losing that choice.

And that’s assuming Oregon manages to remain a blue state. We’re hip deep in Nazis and other brands of fascist right-wingers around here. We put one foot wrong, and we could suddenly be a red state. There goes my protection.

Another thing I worry about is that, due to being sterilized, any pregnancy I have will be ectopic. These idiot red states are already passing laws that may make it difficult – nigh unto impossible in some cases – to be treated for an ectopic pregnancy.

Wish I’d saved the link, but over the weekend I read an article about a woman who turned up with an ectopic pregnancy in the ER recently, and was left to suffer for nine hours while the doctors consulted their lawyers to see if they could legally treat her. While she waited, the pregnancy “burst” and she almost died.

I spent a not inconsiderable amount of time this weekend wondering if I could talk a doctor into an elective hysterectomy. I mean, I’m not far away from menopause anyway, and I have no use for this uterus. I’m in an extremely “get this goddamn thing out of me before it gets me killed” kind of mood, here.

I doubt my insurance would cover an elective hysterectomy, if I could even talk a doctor into doing it, but I have pretty decent credit. I could get a personal loan, maybe.

I’m telling you all this because, even though the odds of me facing this problem are very low, I am terrified. I am like three steps and some bad luck away from dying right now, thanks to the Supreme Court.

I’m in a very fortunate position, and it’s pretty unlikely I’m going to have to deal with this doomsday scenario. And I’m still scared. Can you even imagine how other people who aren’t as lucky as me are feeling right now?

This is the situation people are in all around the United States, and the Democrats who are supposed to be fighting to help us are reading poetry and hosting singalongs on the capitol steps. I cannot begin to describe the fury I felt at Nancy Pelosi reading a goddamn poem on Friday in response to the Roe v. Wade news.

  • NPR: Poll: Majorities oppose Supreme Court’s abortion ruling and worry about other rights – “Majorities of Americans say they disagree with the Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade, think it was politically motivated, are concerned the court will now reconsider rulings that protect other rights, and are more likely to vote for a candidate this fall who would restore the right to an abortion, according to the latest NPR/PBS NewsHour/Marist poll.”